Adoptees and Trust Issues with Spouses and Significant Others

"I can't maintain a relationship, my trust issues are so severe..."

"I've been married three times, and am such a failure at it, with my trust issues...."

Photo Credit: Vagawi, Flickr

"I don't think I can trust anyone enough to marry them...I'm scared to death to make the commitment..."

"I can't get a relationship or keep one!"

I hear this from adoptees, all the time.

I recently met an adoptee who has been engaged for EIGHT YEARS so far. Eight years of engagement, because she is so afraid to fully trust, even though her fiance is, in her words, "amazing." 

And although I've been married for twenty six years, I completely understand.

Adoptees & Dogs... Why They Make a Great Combination

 

"The more I know about people, the better I like my dog."

-- Mark Twain

Clearly the world is crazy about dogs. Well, the normal people are, anyway.  And, the adoration is deserved.

When I was a little girl I had a dog named Kelly, a golden retriever. This is one of my favorite photos of us together, and friends who have seen this photo have remarked that my "style" is still the same. I have boots I wear, exactly like this, still today. And plenty of dresses just like that one in my closet that I wear now. I just don't let them hike that high up on my thighs today. Nobody wants to see that much cellulite.

Kelly has long gone on to be with Jesus, but now I have two huge but gentle dog-a-sauruses named Max and Maddie.

Many people whether adopted or not speak of a very special relationship with their dogs. The strength of character dogs display is particularly appreciated by me, as an adoptee who has a long track record of problems trusting human beings. And not for nothing, I might add!