November 13, 2018

The Disappointment of a Lack of Close DNA Matches

I used to see this in my inbox and get terribly excited. My heart would race and my fingers couldn’t log in fast enough.
Now I see this notification and sometimes I don’t even log in right away.

Everyone says, “Don’t stop believing…”
Honestly some days I do, and some days I don’t.
My faith is high for other people, and other things, but when it comes to having faith for myself, it’s often low. Maybe it’s that adoptee curse of always feeling like you will be the one who is different.  
I logged in yesterday to see my matches and none of them even made the front page. They weren't close 5th-8th cousins.

Unless my father lives to be an extremely old man of Biblical proportions, time is running out.

I continue to hold on to all of my many blessings in life, and accept the fact that this may not be one of them.